This is the story of two blondes who buy two mice.
When they bring them home, one of the two blondes says to the other:
- How are we going to recognize them?
- I know! I will cut the ear off one the mice so that we can differentiate them!
- Yes! You are intelligent!
During the night the mouse which does not have any more ear, complains:
- Why is it that he is allowed to have two ears and me only one???
On this, it bites the ear of the other.
The next morning the two blondes come to see the mice:
- Oh no! How will we know which is which when both have only one ear?
I will cut off the other ear!
- Good idea.
During the night the mouse which does not have any more ears says:
- Why it has one ear and me none?
On this, it begins to eat the ear of the other.
The following day, the two blondes awake:
- Oh no! They do not have any more ears! What should we do?
- Ok, I’ll cut the leg off my mouse!
- Good, good, ok!
And this continues to happen until there is nothing more than their head, body and tail.
- So what should we do now?
- Mm, wait…
- I know! You take the white one and I’ll have the black!
Why do blonde mothers seldom change the their baby’s nappies?
…
???
…
Because on the packing it is says: “Up to 19 kg”.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Suppository ideas
New suppositories with an easily retractable handle, use when you want & take out anytime. They also taste good...
20 sentences
10 sentences which she will never say…
1) Guess what? It’s our anniversary today? I had forgotten all about it!
2) You really went out of your way to talk with me this evening? Wouldn’t you rather watch TV?
3) Oh, this diamond is really too large.
4) And for our honeymoon, let’s take the boat out & go fishing!
5) That outfit I was going to buy would look good on your secretary.
6) I think I need to put on more weight.
7) You’re going in the right direction, I’m just here to follow your lead.
8) If the telephone’s for me, say I’m not here.
9) I don't care, $500 is too expensive even if the dress is beautiful.
10) I want just to see what this motor has in its belly.
10 sentences which he will never say…
1) Here’s the remote control.
2) You know, even though I’m against it, I would really like to discuss it with you.
3) Antonio Banderas and Brad Pitt? Is it absolutely necessary we watch this?
4) Even when I’m tired, I love listening to you talk about your day.
5) Darling, since neither of us planned anything for this afternoon, can we go to choose
the wallpaper for the room?
6) I just want you to hold me in your arms; that is all.
7) Why won’t you come to help me choose a pair of shoes?
8) Let’s just forget the football match & do something you’d like.
9) Let me carry your bag while you try that on.
10) Sometimes I wish we could talk more rather than just jumping in the sack
1) Guess what? It’s our anniversary today? I had forgotten all about it!
2) You really went out of your way to talk with me this evening? Wouldn’t you rather watch TV?
3) Oh, this diamond is really too large.
4) And for our honeymoon, let’s take the boat out & go fishing!
5) That outfit I was going to buy would look good on your secretary.
6) I think I need to put on more weight.
7) You’re going in the right direction, I’m just here to follow your lead.
8) If the telephone’s for me, say I’m not here.
9) I don't care, $500 is too expensive even if the dress is beautiful.
10) I want just to see what this motor has in its belly.
10 sentences which he will never say…
1) Here’s the remote control.
2) You know, even though I’m against it, I would really like to discuss it with you.
3) Antonio Banderas and Brad Pitt? Is it absolutely necessary we watch this?
4) Even when I’m tired, I love listening to you talk about your day.
5) Darling, since neither of us planned anything for this afternoon, can we go to choose
the wallpaper for the room?
6) I just want you to hold me in your arms; that is all.
7) Why won’t you come to help me choose a pair of shoes?
8) Let’s just forget the football match & do something you’d like.
9) Let me carry your bag while you try that on.
10) Sometimes I wish we could talk more rather than just jumping in the sack
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Vanessa Hudgens on the beach with a small bikini, all is well…
Hmmm.... what more is there to say?
Get your dirty hands off....
Actually, I hate competition
Get your dirty hands off....
Actually, I hate competition
The pc virus I'd love to get
Newton Virus by Troika
This is a hilarious and the most artistic virus I’ve ever seen. Sadly, only Macs users can enjoy this one…
This is a hilarious and the most artistic virus I’ve ever seen. Sadly, only Macs users can enjoy this one…
Enter the blondes...
A blonde is walking along a sidewalk and sees a small ant that is crying. She picks it up & puts it in the PALM OF HER HAND and says to him:
- Why do you cry little ant?
- Because it is my birthday and nobody celebrates it with me.
So, the blonde decides to sing to him:
“Happy birthday small ant! Happy birthday small ant!”
Then, CLAPPING
“Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday small ant!
The birthday is abruptly over...
A brunette, redhead and a blonde are together inside a building on fire. They begin to panic because the firemen have been unsuccessful & the lower floors are still ablaze. But just in time four good Samaritans come around the corner with a large blanket and try to save the girls. So they shout to the first:
- Go ahead, jump & we will catch you!
She jumps but as soon as she gets near the blanket the guy removes the blanket and lets the brunette crash to the ground. They call to the second to jump.
- Go ahead, jump! Sorry, we missed the first but this time we’ll definitely catch you!
She jumps but as soon as she gets near the blanket the guy removes the blanket and lets the redhead crash to the ground. They say to the third to jump (there remains only the blonde.)
- No! I am not stupid… put the blanket on the ground and move back; then I will jump!
- Why do you cry little ant?
- Because it is my birthday and nobody celebrates it with me.
So, the blonde decides to sing to him:
“Happy birthday small ant! Happy birthday small ant!”
Then, CLAPPING
“Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday small ant!
The birthday is abruptly over...
A brunette, redhead and a blonde are together inside a building on fire. They begin to panic because the firemen have been unsuccessful & the lower floors are still ablaze. But just in time four good Samaritans come around the corner with a large blanket and try to save the girls. So they shout to the first:
- Go ahead, jump & we will catch you!
She jumps but as soon as she gets near the blanket the guy removes the blanket and lets the brunette crash to the ground. They call to the second to jump.
- Go ahead, jump! Sorry, we missed the first but this time we’ll definitely catch you!
She jumps but as soon as she gets near the blanket the guy removes the blanket and lets the redhead crash to the ground. They say to the third to jump (there remains only the blonde.)
- No! I am not stupid… put the blanket on the ground and move back; then I will jump!
Monday, May 18, 2009
Morning Prayer
Our father who is at the office,
Let my work be light,
That the owners will leave on holiday,
And that our will is made
At the office as at the house.
Give us today a day off,
One week of recovery,
And a month of reflection.
Forgive us our absences,
As we also forgive,
Those which make us work.
Do not subject us to observation,
With the fall of wages,
With embargoes and overtime.
But deliver us from this hell.
Because it is with you that the capacity belongs
To increase our wages and our days off,
While decreasing our work,
Amen.
Let my work be light,
That the owners will leave on holiday,
And that our will is made
At the office as at the house.
Give us today a day off,
One week of recovery,
And a month of reflection.
Forgive us our absences,
As we also forgive,
Those which make us work.
Do not subject us to observation,
With the fall of wages,
With embargoes and overtime.
But deliver us from this hell.
Because it is with you that the capacity belongs
To increase our wages and our days off,
While decreasing our work,
Amen.
Classic Cat Compilation
Yes, I'm sure you've probably seen these videos before but they are some of the most popular cat videos of recent times, which are worth seeing again & again...
Pet of the week
Ninja Cat
Cat vs. Big Box
Dancing Kittens
Pet of the week
Ninja Cat
Cat vs. Big Box
Dancing Kittens
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Effects of the Coffee
This animated video is of a French song about drinking too much coffee. Don't let the language put you off, the animation is very funny. Reminds me of when I was drinking 12 cups a day...
Friday, May 15, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
